At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
I am dying of drunk and no thats not a typo.
Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
i woke up to 115 texts from him all saying "do you love me??"
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
OMG the post office opened my dildo! "we sincerely regret the damage to your package"
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
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