sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
proudest moment: just made a guy walk into a parked car with his mouth hanging open cause of the shirt im wearing.
i could't wear that belt anymore, it was gonna make me keep shitting for the rest of the night
Did you just see the Batmobile???
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
Drunk sex destroyed my coffee table... ikea this weekend?
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
It's 1pm, she's in the shower, I don't have the guts tell her I wasn't her blind date. Someone got stood up.
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
YOU WILL GIVE ME MASHED POTATOES OR I WILL RIP YOUR SOUL INTO 7 PIECES AND YOU WILL TURN INTO LORD VOLDEMORT
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