I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
I'm at subway, this 8 year old kid is judging my fashion sense with his dad. I want to kill myself.
It's ok, he's just 8, he's not judging you.
He just asked why I'm sitting alone. I honestly want to cry.
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
this will be a night to untag.
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
I'm just waiting til he drunkenly pisses in his new man's car the way he always whipped it out and went Bellagio in mine.
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
Then you fell out of your chair, looked right at me and said, "You are sooo drunk."
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
Randomize
