i have nine cents in my fucking bank account... not even a dime
he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
It's like Facebook knows when I'm about to masturbate and tells me to reconnect with exes.
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
The taxi driver was going on about how many drunk chicks want to sleep with him when he drives them home. Not sure if he was bragging or hinting
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
Randomize
