I want to stick my p in your. b.
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
Penises. Penises everywhereeeeeeeee. Penis ratio is sooo disproportionate. I can't NOT get laid tonight.
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex
We still need to grow old, buy a house, and drink 40's while wearing old people sunglasses, staring at the young studs mowing our lawn.
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
GOOD NEWS I CAN BRING THE VODKA IN MY LUGGAGE
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
Randomize