I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
I just farted in the bathroom and the guy in the stall next to me started gagging. Its a beauitful day
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
Apparently being drunk on a southwest flight and yelling "TURNUP" during take off is looked down upon in this state.
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
Randomize
