i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
gonna sleep on the stairs... to drunk to keep going up, way to drunk to go down, gonna find a comfy spot right here... its safer that way
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
What a better way to celebrate that I'm single by becoming a stripper and making $1000 in one night
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
Randomize
