dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
Ah that type of Dick. I think my phones trying to make me less of a whore by capitalizing Dick. That way it looks like I'm talking about a dude not penis
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
Did I actually say goodbye last night or did I just poison you with vodka and disappear?
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
I licked your asshole in confidence.
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
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