You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
just threw up while drinking by myself. This is all your fault. You here = a good night, You not here = alcoholism
Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
apparently i was offering everyone ambien and shouting, it's only like heath ledger if you want it to be!
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
Yep. Just threw myself a bachelorette party with my coworkers penis before I re-enter the holy order of monogomous relationships.
Good thing I took the morning after pill cuz I pretty much had packaged seamen in me like I was a squirrel saving it for later or something
She keeps telling me I can't keep feeding the dog my food. I gave half the weed brownie to the dog and half to me. I just want it to taste the greatness of cheezits like I am.
Did you send me a cake saying 'Happy 1st One-Night Stand Ever'?
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
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