This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
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