So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
how many times in life can you be kicked out of a pizza buffet for vomiting on the food and insulting small children
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
you will always have a special place in my vag
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
I'm kinda amazed by how many times I've texted the word penis today.
Super awkward that I just now realized I added no verb to the first statement about super hero porn. We were watching it, not making it. Clarity.
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
Randomize
