You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
overheard a conversation between 2 lesbians: 'back when I used to have dick sex...' oh, vegas, I so heart you
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
arnt you supposed to become a mature adult when you move out of your parents house?
Moving out doesnt mean I'm mature, it means I can make pancakes and bacon at 3 in the morning and no one can judge me.
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
HE'S FUCKING 19 YEARS OLD, HE CAN'T EVEN GET INTO A BAR WITH ME, WHAT MAKES YOU THINK I'LL LET HIM IN MY PANTS?!
Randomize
