sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
I needed to borrow my dads nail clippers and next to it was an industrial size box of condoms if that wasnt bad enough I dropped the clippers behind the bed and discovered hundreds of used condoms
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
why is it whenever you puke in the park there are always little kids on the swings?
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
Just because the energy drink is shaped like a grenade doesnt make it cool to throw it and yell "BOOM" and break my flatscreen, asshole
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
Randomize
