I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
Literally had a conversation with the pizza as to why it was a bad idea to reach in the back seat and grab a slice while driving. The pizza was right, it was safer to just wait until I got home.
You also spilled beer on my dog and tried to wipe it off with a paper towel but he kept getting away from you.
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
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