Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
just went to get groceries. a cashier said she saw me last night. i guess i carried a broom back from the party and swept the street the whole walk back...and i claimed to be in the cast of wicked
i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
You talked about giving to sperm banks on a first date. What did you expect?
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
THE EAGLE HAS MY PANTIES. I REPEAT. THE FUCKING MASCOT HAS MY PANTIES.
HOLY SHIT. You're my hero.
You FaceTimed me at three in the morning while you were peeing. Your eyes were glazed over and you showed me your bellybutton.
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
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