Omg alex and i were cooking weiners on a campfire and a bear came and i am waayyy too high for this
tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota.
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
Fuck. What bets did I make about "yeah when the Cubs win the World Series" that I gotta reneg on????
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
Randomize
