Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
Your cousin just asked the bartender to start a round of vagina shots. Not body shots. Vagina shots. We're taking her out more often.
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
After much deliberatipn and vodka, my favourite phrase of Christmas 2012 is "penis of last resort"
I don't know if I want context or not...
Context involves faux incest and champagne. Id go into detail but im on shot number 5.
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
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