Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
Apparently I took a selfie with fried chicken at 2 am....I'm still trying to figure out where I got the chicken. I thought I was making mac & cheese.
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
Randomize
