I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
Note for the future: whiskey syrup is AMAZING on 3am pancakes.
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
Randomize
