Heybabeimwearingurpanties
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
How the hell am I supposed to know what lotion to get her? They should have a dressing booth where I could go test how good it is for jerking off, then I'd know.
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
On a separate note, I just found out some condoms aren't vegan. Problem.
Hahahaha I can't wait for you to ask "wait. are there any animal by products in that?"
I woke up with a cutting board and a bag of uncooked pasta next to me.
I won the 'drunkest person at a family event' award tonight.
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
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