he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
You better be Eskimo Brother-ing the FUCK out of tonight right now. Long distance 'balls deep' high five
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
she said she wouldn't go home with me until she looked up my name in her sex offender app. do i really give off that vibe?
Yeah. It's not just the beard either.
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
There is nothing wrong with watching parks and rec all day then getting blackout drunk by night
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
Randomize
