I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
had no condoms so I just made do with an empty doritos bag.
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
I'm eating cheerios out of the palm of my hand while I pee with the door open. Is this adulthood?
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
We didn't mean to put a petting zoo in the elevator.
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize