therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
you pushed her into a kiddie pool and knocked out her front teeth... and you still managed to get laid. what. the. fuck.
constantly striving to make life awkward and more complicated, one drunk bone at a time.
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
Come share oat with me in your robe
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
So apparently, after 11 beers, 2 pitchers of sangria and 3 rhum & cokes, the idea of popping a load of MD and jumping on the trampoline, in the woods, in my underwear was the best one ever.
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
Randomize
