How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
If Jon and Kate can get divorced...how hard can it be for me?
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
anyone who says 'i love you' and then followed by 'im going to call the cops if you touch me' doesnt really mean the first part fyi
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
the arrest was probably divine intervention, cause i think we were heading to an ill-advised threesome.
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
I just had a contest with the toilet to see who could hold their breath longest.
I won
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
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