"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
If God's watching us, we might as well be entertaining
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
You drunk yet?
Nope. Give me two hours then delete my texts before you read them.
Cant make any promises.
oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
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