Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
Today's weekday brunch started at 2pm, and consisted of $7 of sandwich and $50 of cocktails. Also, I hustled the bartender for about $3 playing nickel poker, but he may have been letting me win. Either way, he didn't get into my pants.
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
I thought I was pretty much sober now but then I realized I've been eating scrambled eggs with my hands...
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
no dude he sent me cemetery flowers, i know it. they are half dried out roses in the shape of a cross, seriously. and he is not religious. so he robbed a freaking grave site for me. am i like an accessory to grave robbing now??
damnit this is what you get for dating guys with neck tattoos
Randomize