its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
Contents of my pockets this morning: phone, condom, one hoop earring, half a cheeseburger, lighter and a $87 receipt from tacobell. Time for work.
A homeless guy wouldnt accept my granola bar because he didnt have any teeth. I think i win the prize for the ultimate rejection
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
What kind of present accurately says to my male suitemate "I'm sorry that I accidentally flashed you my vagina while I was super drunk"?
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
Randomize
