I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
forgot a fork. i am eating fettucini alfredo with a comb that i rinsed off the the bathroom sink. eating alone in my car. life doesn't get any sadder than this
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
I am so dumb. I made a mistake and let him get away.
Don't worry, there are other penises in the sea.
Thanks, mom.
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