im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
I'm sobbing to NWA
I ditched my one night stand in the hotel lobby. How did he add me on Snapchat?
Why do all my exes just become Tom Hanks in Castaway?
That's a fantastic question. And an odd set of criteria to meet if wanting to date you.
Randomize
