Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
You tied the party balloons to your nipple ring so that everyone would know you partied.
I am going to get arrested. I am yelling fuck repeatedly, wearing a Bird jersey and polka dot pants while pounding wine. Amazing mug shot to follow.
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
Dude. Why is there a hamster in my pocket? WHAT THE FUCK WAS IN THAT JOINT
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
I'm drunk. And I'm alone. Eating chicken fingers in my underwear. I'd say life is grand.
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
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