We sat in your minivan all night in a parking lot pretending we were in the magic school bus going to the sun
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
A girl just asked me to co-sign for her boob job because she didn't have enough credit built up. This is a first.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
Do you know how to give stiches?
I do not...this text concerns me
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
How much weight does it take to launch a cat using a trebuchet vs the tension required for a catapult?
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
You know you're out of shape when you're sore after masturbating.
Randomize