Rescue me. My white trash great uncle just pulled out his belly at the restaurant to show us how big this woman's tit was
Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
dude, osama threatened the US again
dude. i slept with your sister last night
what?
I saw that as an opertune moment to drop some big news
quit re-tweeting John McCain's tweets
My 40 year old neighbors are throwing a party for their eight year old niece's birthday. It's 1am and they're still partying hard. Harder than me. It's Saturday. Just say it, I'm a disgrace to the generation.
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
I wonder if she thought to herself "I'm gonna sleep with that guy tonight" when she watched me puke on the bar at 3 in the afternoon?
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
I got back from work this morning after working the night shift to find an NFL player scaling the side of our apartment...from your window. He just took sneaking out to all new level. Care to explain?
I think that about sums it up, actually.
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
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