youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
I think I met somebody from your birthday this past weekend. He said I held a push up contest outside the bar and told them I would make out with the winner. He said he won..
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
I think I just sharted jello shots
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
Randomize
