Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
Just woke up and my doorbell is on my nightstand... the fuck?
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
Dan marino should def buy this ambulance. But not this one. I'm gonna fuck this ambulance up
I don't care how much you're grieving a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
Randomize
