Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
And by "hammer out the details" you know I mean spending 20 minutes on wedding plans then getting wine drunk, right?
So the keyword here is "hammered"?
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
Randomize