found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
There was no eligible dick at the ER. I'm pissed. Looks like "Searching for Strange at the Local Free Clinic" is a no go for the name of our first full length album. On the other hand, I got a dilaudid shot and I no longer feel like I have the worst bladder infection of my life.
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
I'm determined to sit on that face.
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
There's a difference tho. *I* drink at seven in the morning because I work graveyards. YOU drink at seven in the morning cause you're an alcoholic.
Randomize