MY DAD AND I ARE ON OUR WAY OUT OF FLORENCE AND I JUST SAW A MAN AT A BUS STOP WITH A GIMP HAND SLAP HIS DAUGHTER ACROSS THE FACE WITH IT.
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
I just called my grandma crying, apologizing for being the first grandchild to have premarital sex...I'm either about to start my period or pregnant.
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
Randomize
