wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
Facebook lets you pick usernames now. You'd better log on and get yours before homewreckingwhore is taken...
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
I got her a Nickelback box set.
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
You're dating a nurse! That's smart, you never know when you'll have a medical emergency. Probably liver failure.
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
I'm way too hungover for life right now
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
Randomize