I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
just found out my horoscope sign is scales. it's like i was destined to be a drug dealer
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
There was a guy on the elevator dressed as santa in flip-flops giving away beer.
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
My mom just told me I look like darth vader. how's your night?
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
Randomize
