PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
he just asked me to email him a handle of captain morgans...how sober do you think he is?
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
apparently it isn't appropriate to tell a coworker who is eating celery because it's "negative calories" that a blowjob is too
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
Puked in my purse on my Uber ride home last night. Safe to say it's not a good idea to beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
Randomize
