Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
So awkward... The newspaper lady just caught me sitting stoned in my driveway at 5 am and asked if I was okay. I'm way better than ok right now
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
You're even getting laid in my dreams, god I'm a good wingman
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
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