I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
my mom was in labor with me for 32 hours, it's only fair to start drinking now.
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
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