Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(310): View more from California

I understand how i shit in my shoes, but explain why you were wearing them.

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(609): View more from New Jersey

ignore voicemail. the cock hath been unblocked.

Fav 3 3551 769
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(603): View more from New Hampshire

He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet

Fav 7 1077 2653
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(919): View more from North Carolina

My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.

Fav 6 3866 901
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(919): View more from North Carolina

i made sure i dropped the whole "im a yoga teacher" bomb which basically roofies a guys sense of judgement and guarantees he will sleep with me.

Fav 42 10612 1279
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(330): View more from Ohio

I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.

Fav 9 1302 3724
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(401): View more from Rhode Island

hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already

Fav 7 3020 1127
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(320): View more from Minnesota

I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.

Fav 1 398 805
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(304): View more from West Virginia

After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.

Fav 0 49 4
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