i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
Can Purell be used as lube?
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
Randomize
