pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
You kept mumbling that you could become one with the carpet as you proceeded to give yourself the worst carpet burn I have ever seen
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
Tell me not to drink and get on ladders. I think I need the reminder.. I'm clumsy enough sober.
Randomize
