Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
Breakfast sounds amazing but can we do IHOP instead? I have to pick up a Plan B pill and there’s a CVS next to it
Randomize
