he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
dude she got out of bed and definitely took a shit then checked her stomach out in the mirror and whispered "well that probably took off five pounds"
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
He couldn’t find my clit with a map. Literally. I drew him a map.
Randomize
