Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
nothing worse than sitting down ready for a solid porn sesh to find out your internet is out. comcast owes me a handjob
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
the arrest was probably divine intervention, cause i think we were heading to an ill-advised threesome.
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
i just got drunk and created an entire Dr Seuss unit for my first graders.
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
Randomize
