Having your wife answer your cell was so lame. Maybe we can talk when you get your phone, your facebook account, and your balls back.
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
you were walking down the sidewalk and just puked. didnt even stop or slow down and just kept going. i was so impressed i didnt even tell anyone you threw up on passing peoples shoes.
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
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