Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
Do you know how hard it is to masturbate with a runny nose?
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
Where would I incorporate "your boyfriend fucked the shit out of me last night" before or after Merry Christmas bitch?
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
Randomize
