We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
shattered his nose in 8 pieces. Blaming it on the dog. I feel more guilty about ruining the dog's good name than I do about ruining his nose.
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize
