well my last 2 orgasms were over shoe sales at macy's. what does that tell you?
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
he texted me at 1 in the morning to ask if i wanted to come over and play in the snow with him
at least he gets points for a creative booty call
I had a dream that I got a gift certificate to a lavish spa from my father. I think dream dad, along with real dad, think I'm gay.
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
Randomize
