ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
one day I'm really going to regret not using the boners I got in planes and cars
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
It's going to be weird as hell when you have kids. I'll meet them and think "Hi, Did you know that I was almost your dad?"
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
I also told the pizza delivery guy that he smelled good. I must be ovulating.
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
The moment when you and your BFF compare frequently used emojis and realize you have similar mental disorders and a really weak alibi.
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
Randomize
